[ the fact that klavier reaches for his hand helps. despite apollo's hesitations about where this is going (what it means, rather, not about following through) , klavier pursuing helps. he takes the offered hand and he shoots him a look that says he almost dares him to mention the way his grip is a little tight.
regardless of the conversation that will unfold, he's pretty determined to stay. he steps out of the elevator and begins to pull ahead, but he stops shortly in the hallway and looks at klavier again. he doesn't move, but he remains close and keeps his hand for himself. this is apollo relinquishing control for the moment. this is apollo putting some trust in klavier and letting him take charge.
so yeah, he follows him into the hotel room and shuts the door behind them, letting klavier dictate what comes first. ]
So... talking. [ he says it to prompt, but it's another form of apollo trying to trust him. he knows he can throw himself into things head first, but he's giving klavier the chance to talk or act first to follow his lead. ]
[ moments ago, a scenario played out in klavier's head where there were hardly words spoken as soon as the door was opened—nothing but pillow talk and murmurs and each other's names until deep in the evening, after they'd devoured and had their fill of the other. now, when the door closes, klavier is preparing the many words he's turned in his head since this vacation started, exacerbated by his own life ending once, apollo's ending twice.
he doesn't let go of his hand, instead leading him to the bedside to sit with him, other hand in his pocket. ]
I only mentioned my fame and our predicament as lawyers to ask if you're prepared to face them... once we leave this place.
[ again, he needs to believe that they will or he'll just go insane. ]
I consider the Gavinners' disbandment and the incarceration of my brother to be... something like the end of two long-term commitments. You understand my faith in my own judgment feels slightly impaired... but if there is one other person I feel I can place my trust in, it would be you. So I would like to know you better, outside of a place like this one.
[ would he really be apollo justice if he didn't stand in his own way sometimes? sure, okay, he's thought about this once or twice., what it might be like to go out and sleep with klavier gavin with no strings attached. something casual and fun and easy, too overcome with desire to even let himself think. he'd almost managed it, but now... he's too curious about what klavier must be thinking. it feels significant now that he's slowed them down for this talk. he wordlessly follows him to the bed and takes a seat, adjusting so he can face him but holding his hand. the bracelet arm lays across his lap loosely, but he doesn't look away.
he opens his mouth to interrupt, but he stops short when klavier mentions two source of grief. losing first his brother, and then his best friend, and the disbandment of something he poured his life into... of course he understands the hesitance. apollo himself has his own guilt tied to these things and his hand in them. it's part of why he was resistant to this idea for so long. when klavier finishes speaking, he takes a few moments of his own to collect his thoughts.
they will get out of here. it's important to think about the after. ]
... your dedication is a lot of what I like about you, you know? And... it takes a lot to look at those things and decide you might have to lose them because the truth is more important. Not everyone could. [ he looks down at their hands then. ] Honestly? I didn't know how to approach you afterwards. I wanted to. I... needed to know you were going to be fine, but I didn't know if you would even want to see me or if what I had to say would matter. It's part of why I left.
[ he needed to separate himself from home for a short while to try and sort his thoughts and worries. ]
I want to trust you. And I want to be someone you can trust, too. So... slow is actually better. [ a tiny note of relief in his tone, and an even smaller but honest smile. ] Maybe just... like you said, getting to know each other better outside of work. I'd like that.
[ it's apollo willing to slow down to prove klavier's judgment can be sound again. it's also apollo trying his best to relinquish the tight grip on his own heart and actually let someone try with him. he knows himself well enough to realize he may not be as fast in a courtship as someone else wants, but... maybe that's what makes klavier perfect for him right now. ]
For all the grief you've given me, you are a romantic at heart yourself, nein? Wanting to check in on me and comfort me, needing to know I am all right... I had no idea you were so doting.
[ he's teasing again, but in quiet, genuine appreciation. his expression softens, and he lets go of apollo's hand to take him by the arm instead, near the elbow. ]
I won't deny being upset about circumstances in general, but you especially are free to visit me, and I will hear anything you have to say. For now...
[ he places a hand on apollo's hip and gently tugs with the other. ]
That is not being doting. That's being a decent human. [ he says this but he isn't remotely mad about it. also not denying the romantic thing even though he very much is not. not in the way he's sensing klavier is. but hey, apollo's sense of romance really is just being attentive of the people he cares about and willing to do anything for them. he's been worried for a while, and even seeing klavier tease him doesn't incite the usual indignation that comes up but rather helps the tension drains from his shoulders. it's why he settles for watching him, letting klavier's hand move up his arm as he tilts his head. ]
But good to know. I'll see if I can work you into my busy schedule then. [ it's a dumb little joke because, well, look at the WAA. he has plenty of time for something like this. likewise, he has plenty of time right now to do what it is he wants to do and prove that klavier can trust him. he barely has to pull before apollo moves, easily tipping into his lap and letting his hands carefully cradle his face. where were they...? oh, right. kissing senselessly. he can pick up where they left off. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
regardless of the conversation that will unfold, he's pretty determined to stay. he steps out of the elevator and begins to pull ahead, but he stops shortly in the hallway and looks at klavier again. he doesn't move, but he remains close and keeps his hand for himself. this is apollo relinquishing control for the moment. this is apollo putting some trust in klavier and letting him take charge.
so yeah, he follows him into the hotel room and shuts the door behind them, letting klavier dictate what comes first. ]
So... talking. [ he says it to prompt, but it's another form of apollo trying to trust him. he knows he can throw himself into things head first, but he's giving klavier the chance to talk or act first to follow his lead. ]
no subject
he doesn't let go of his hand, instead leading him to the bedside to sit with him, other hand in his pocket. ]
I only mentioned my fame and our predicament as lawyers to ask if you're prepared to face them... once we leave this place.
[ again, he needs to believe that they will or he'll just go insane. ]
I consider the Gavinners' disbandment and the incarceration of my brother to be... something like the end of two long-term commitments. You understand my faith in my own judgment feels slightly impaired... but if there is one other person I feel I can place my trust in, it would be you. So I would like to know you better, outside of a place like this one.
Are you open to taking things slowly?
no subject
he opens his mouth to interrupt, but he stops short when klavier mentions two source of grief. losing first his brother, and then his best friend, and the disbandment of something he poured his life into... of course he understands the hesitance. apollo himself has his own guilt tied to these things and his hand in them. it's part of why he was resistant to this idea for so long. when klavier finishes speaking, he takes a few moments of his own to collect his thoughts.
they will get out of here. it's important to think about the after. ]
... your dedication is a lot of what I like about you, you know? And... it takes a lot to look at those things and decide you might have to lose them because the truth is more important. Not everyone could. [ he looks down at their hands then. ] Honestly? I didn't know how to approach you afterwards. I wanted to. I... needed to know you were going to be fine, but I didn't know if you would even want to see me or if what I had to say would matter. It's part of why I left.
[ he needed to separate himself from home for a short while to try and sort his thoughts and worries. ]
I want to trust you. And I want to be someone you can trust, too. So... slow is actually better. [ a tiny note of relief in his tone, and an even smaller but honest smile. ] Maybe just... like you said, getting to know each other better outside of work. I'd like that.
[ it's apollo willing to slow down to prove klavier's judgment can be sound again. it's also apollo trying his best to relinquish the tight grip on his own heart and actually let someone try with him. he knows himself well enough to realize he may not be as fast in a courtship as someone else wants, but... maybe that's what makes klavier perfect for him right now. ]
no subject
For all the grief you've given me, you are a romantic at heart yourself, nein? Wanting to check in on me and comfort me, needing to know I am all right... I had no idea you were so doting.
[ he's teasing again, but in quiet, genuine appreciation. his expression softens, and he lets go of apollo's hand to take him by the arm instead, near the elbow. ]
I won't deny being upset about circumstances in general, but you especially are free to visit me, and I will hear anything you have to say. For now...
[ he places a hand on apollo's hip and gently tugs with the other. ]
Come here.
[ get in his lap and kiss him please ]
no subject
That is not being doting. That's being a decent human. [ he says this but he isn't remotely mad about it. also not denying the romantic thing even though he very much is not. not in the way he's sensing klavier is. but hey, apollo's sense of romance really is just being attentive of the people he cares about and willing to do anything for them. he's been worried for a while, and even seeing klavier tease him doesn't incite the usual indignation that comes up but rather helps the tension drains from his shoulders. it's why he settles for watching him, letting klavier's hand move up his arm as he tilts his head. ]
But good to know. I'll see if I can work you into my busy schedule then. [ it's a dumb little joke because, well, look at the WAA. he has plenty of time for something like this. likewise, he has plenty of time right now to do what it is he wants to do and prove that klavier can trust him. he barely has to pull before apollo moves, easily tipping into his lap and letting his hands carefully cradle his face. where were they...? oh, right. kissing senselessly. he can pick up where they left off. ]